For the last several months, I keep hearing people talk about 2020 as if it were the worst year in human history. Already people are looking longingly towards 2021 – or even 2022 – with the idea that anything would be better than what’s happened this year. Certainly 2020 has challenged all of us in ways we never could have anticipated. I have been through some of the lowest moments of my life this year, but I have also felt happier than I have in years. This dumpster fire that we call 2020 has changed me and continues to change me.
I ran across a quote this week that I’ve been thinking about for the last few days.
“Optimism is usually defined as a belief that things will go well. But that’s incomplete. Sensible optimism is a belief that the odds are in your favor, and over time things will balance out to a good outcome even if what happens in between is filled with misery. And in fact you know it will be filled with misery. You can be optimistic that the long-term growth trajectory is up and to the right, but equally sure that the road between now and then is filled with landmines, and always will be. Those two things are not mutually exclusive.”
Morgan Housel
This quote resonates with me for many reasons. I consider myself an optimist, even though I often find myself struggling with self-doubt and hopelessness. Even in my darkest moments, I’ve felt the optimism that says misery is just part of the journey. I’ve never completely given up hope that things will work out for my good.
In addition, I think I would add a few things to Housel’s definition of optimism. Sensible, realistic optimism is open to a variety of solutions and actively searches them out. I also think that realistic optimism not only accepts misery and challenges, it embraces them as the vehicle that moves us towards better things, the catalyst for change. Sensible, realistic optimism doesn’t just change our perspective on life. It changes the way we act. By believing things will work out for our good, we act in a way that ensures they will.
Throughout the last six months, I’ve seen a variety of responses to the pandemic. I’ve had a variety of responses myself. I’ve seen people (and myself) respond with anger and frustration. They want things to go back to normal and can’t see how anything good can come out of this. I’ve seen people (and myself) become resigned to how things are. Their anger and frustration has mostly fizzled out, but they are still just waiting until they can start doing things again. I’ve also seen people (and, thankfully, sometimes myself) embrace this time as an opportunity to grow. They’ve taken advantage of the extra time to learn new skills, to reach out to others and strengthen relationships, and to find new and better ways of doing things.
How do you measure a year? It may be an exaggeration to say that 2020 saved my life, but it is not an exaggeration to say that I will leave this year a different – and I believe stronger – person than I was when I started it. If I were to measure each year solely on personal growth, 2020 would be in the top five best years of my life. This year I have grown and become stronger intellectually, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. In areas where I still struggle, I have a much better idea of what to work on in the future.
When I look back on 2020, I will remember it as the year I became a writer, the year I rediscovered just how much I love to teach, the year that I remembered what it felt like to be happy with things the way they are without wanting to change anything. I look forward to the future. I don’t know what 2021 will bring, but I believe a lot of good will come with it. Hopefully I will find ways to use what I learned this year to continue to learn and grow. Whatever happens, I will always be grateful for 2020.